Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Another nugget of Chinglish

One of my Chinese contacts in the education field recently created this inspired fusion of 'below' and 'following' to introduce a list. I had queried a rather garbled timetable of possible seminars I might be delivering for her this month, and she replied, "Please note the bellowing:....."

Priceless!


I would like to pass on the same advice to the builders "at the bottom of my garden". Yes, that noise you hear from the top-floor balcony up there is a crazed laowai who's going to get very ugly indeed when his mail-order Kalashnikov arrives. Take heed, and keep your heads down!

Yes, the saga of the building site next door continues.....

The cessation of 24/7 clanking over the weekend proved to be only a tantalising respite. Perhaps it was not, after all, my vociferous complaining that had shut them down (I did hear rumours that building work was being suspended - or at least significantly curtailed - all over the city for a few days, to try to make a better impression on visiting European ministers). Although the machinery was stilled for nearly 3 full days, the labourers were still carrying on with the pick-and-shovel work, albeit intermittently and perhaps slightly surreptitiously, throughout that time; and late on Sunday night they started gearing up for full-scale operations.

On Monday night, the crafty buggers were fairly quiet during the evening, but then started up their dratted mechanical shovel (and its attendant convoy of tipper trucks) at around midnight. I suspect they'd arranged things like this, so that most of the affected, afflicted householders would have gone to bed and fallen asleep before there was anything much to complain of..... and might perhaps not wake up..... or not think there was any point in trying to complain to anyone in the middle of the night. I went through the same cycle of complaining as I had on the previous Thursday night, but this time without any apparent result. I spent a night of very shallow and broken sleep on the sofa in the living room (which at least has the sound-dampening advantage of the 'double glazing' effect produced by the enclosed balcony at the end of the room).

But then, last night....... blissful, unbelievable SILENCE. Had my complaints of the previous evening (or the further complaints I tried to make during the day) finally had some effect? Will this prove to be another false dawn, another teasing phantom...... or will the law-abiding, slumber-respecting regime continue tonight and tomorrow as well?

Well, if it doesn't....... that Kalashnikov should be here soon.

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